This is part three of my series on retraining negative thoughts. Last time we talked about the thinking mistakes, or “distortions” that we make when we are telling ourselves negative thoughts. To help get more familiar with the distortions, here are some examples of thinking errors/distortions. See if you can identify them.

1. You’ve made dinner and your partner complains that it’s overcooked. You feel sad and angry. Your thoughts: “I’m a total failure. I can’t stand it! I never do anything right. I work like a slave and this is all the thanks I get. What a jerk!” Which thinking distortion is going on here?

a All-or-nothing thinking
b Overgeneralization
c Magification
d Labelling
e All of the Above

There are lots of distortions in these thoughts, so the answer is e.
“I’m a total failure” – All Or Nothing Thinking. The dinner was a little dry, but it doesn’t make your entire life a failure.
“I never do anything right” – Overgeneralizing. Never? Not anything?
“I can’t stand it!” – Overgeneralizing. You have withstood unpleasant situations before, and you will again. You are Magnifying your pain.
“Slave… jerk”. You are Labelling both of you.

2. You were informed you have to take a test for work. Your heart sinks, and you think, “Oh no, not another test. I always do badly on tests. I’ll have to find a way to get out of it. I’m too anxious to do it.” Which thinking mistake(s) are going on here?

a. Fortune-Teller error
b. Overgeneralization
c. All-or-Nothing thinking.
d. Personalisation
e. Emotional reasoning

[Answers below]

3. You receive a redundancy notice from your employer. You feel mad and frustrated. You think, “This proves the world sucks. I never get a break.” Your distortions include,

a. All-or-Nothing Thinking
b. Disqualifying the positive
c. Mental filter
d. Personalization
e. Should statement

4. You’re about to deliver a presentation at work and your heart is pounding. You feel tense and nervous because you think, “My god, I’ll probably forget what I’m supposed to say. My presentation isn’t any good anyway. My mind will go blank. I’ll make a fool of myself.” Your thinking errors involve,

a. All-or-Nothing Thinking
b. Disqualifying the positive
c Fortune-Teller error
d. Minimization
e. Labelling

Answers:
2. A B C E
3. A C
4. A C D E

In the above examples, what sort of things could you say to yourself to argue against the distortions?
e.g., in the first example where you Labelled yourself a “slave”, you could tell yourself: “I work hard and that’s a good thing, but I’m not a slave nor inferior. I am someone doing their best, and mistakes are OK.”

Here is a great YouTube video going over these distortions, which will help you understand and apply them.

If this all seems too simple, I assure you it works – if you regularly put it into practice whenever you have negative feelings. Habits take time to change; why not give this a go? What have you got to lose?

These ideas are adapted from the book by David Burns – Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy. You only need to read chapter three.

Where To Get Help
A list of phone and other services if you need help